Two weeks ago an unexpected packet came home in the Kid’s school bag. We were to fill out a dozen cards with the names and addresses of friends and family members and return them to school so that everyone we’d listed could be sent a solicitation for magazines. The deal was that if two or more people from our list ordered a magazine subscription, the kid would get a “free” Spongebob t-shirt. Plus! If everyone in the class returns their packets, the class would get a “great class prize.”
We threw it out.
Then, on Thursday, the kid asks us about it. He has a note from his teacher that if he doesn’t return his packet, the whole class will not get their “great class prize.” He was quite distressed that not only would he not get this great prize, but it would be his fault that nobody in the class got it. So we send a note back saying we need a new one.
We fill out the cards with bogus names and addresses and send them back. We figure if they’re going to use manipulative, unfair marketing on our kid, we’re going to give them what they deserve.
On Monday, the kid comes home with a plastic gym teacher’s whistle and a soft plastic light-up ring. In the 20 minutes he had it before school was out, the ring had already broken. The soft plastic had ripped open and the light had fallen out. He’s heartbroken that his “great class prize” is broken, and no, he can’t have another one.
I brought it up at the school advisory council (a.k.a. PTA) meeting. I tried to be nice about it. I said that as a parent, I didn’t agree at all with the way that fundraiser worked, that it was manipulative and unfair both to the parents who are asked to throw their friends and relatives under the bus, and to the kids who when their parents refuse to do so suffer the wrath of all their classmates – not to mention that the “great class prize” sucked.
They all nodded in agreement. One of the ladies even said, “Yes, I’ve heard that from other parents in the past.” (I refrained from saying, “Then why do you continue to do it?”)
The principal said that the school gets $250 for doing it.
I said, I’d give the school $250 not to do it.
More nods around the table but they didn’t take me up on my offer.
Why do I have a feeling we’re going to see this again next year?

